Saturday, 25 February 2012

WOMEN CAN'T DRIVE....


 It’s not that I have anything against women, especially since I belong to that particular field of chromosomes, but I adhere to the general notion that women folks can’t drive. There are certain things which women can do and men cant. For example, blame everything on PMS. Similarly, there are certain things which men can do which women can’t and that is drive a vehicle the way it should be. 

Now since exceptions are a part of life, there can be women like Danica Patrick or Desiré Wilson who is the only woman to win a Formula One race of any kind till date. But that was back in the 1980’s! Now illustrated below are the few of the many reasons why women can’t drive.

1) Heel Tragedy- Women prefer to present their very best form, wherever they go and an essential part of this feel good about yourself factor, is the shoes you adorn your feet with. High Heels might look super sexy, but when it comes to its relationship with car brakes or accelerator, it screams anarchy. But my Amma has a solution for this and that is to remove those heels before you start the ignition. Almost feels like it’s a holy ritual to drive!

2) Rear-View Mirror dysfunction- The rear view mirror which is normally installed in the car so as to be able to keep a check on the cars following, assumes the role of a make-up mirror. The woman slides into the driving seat, adjusts the rear-view mirror in a way that her face or her pouty lips are visible and drives the car with more than half of her concentration on her smudged eyeliner. 

3) Multitasking- Women are generally called the multitasking connoisseurs, but sometimes, they abuse the privilege a bit too much and in areas they shouldn’t be. Women care too much about not returning a text or ignoring a call because rudeness even if you are driving is not acceptable. Even if the reply is as stupid as ‘OMG’, ‘SRSLY?’, ‘LOL’, there just has to be a reply to every message that comes our way. 

4) Just Cant Park- Women may be able to drive far safely than men on an open highway, but when it comes to parking, the chances of them hitting a dormant car, or a wall is beyond the normal probability level. Reversing is just not our forte. There is a scientific reason backing me up, which Google pointed out. 

5) Dolls Over Cars- Car servicing is the last thing a woman will consider, even is the vehicle reacts with a smoking engine, unusual blare etc. Men get an adrenaline rush when it comes to cars and long drives, but for women, they rather enjoy the view or drive just for the sake of reaching the destination. Women are built that way. Blame it on the genes. 

But look at the brighter side of life. When it comes to driving, being a woman has its own perk. A smile accompanied by some eyelid fluttering is enough to ward off the cops. People will always hold a soft corner towards you if you happen to be the woman in a road accident, even if it was your fault. You will be rushed towards by a crowd to be helped because you just got your knee scratched, while the man you hit might be having a haemorrhage. Also, women might be bad with maps, but they aren’t stubborn bulldogs like the men when it comes to asking for directions. When men try to listen to their nonexistent sixth sense, women merely roll the glass down and ask for directions.

P.S- Don’t hate me for writing this. I am out of topics so thought of writing something just to back up the men folk with the stereotype they hold against women. It’s absurd for sure!

P.P.S- I have a driving licence which enables me to drive a four wheeler. The fact that I have never driven a car on road didn’t matter when I was given the licence. The only time I have driven a car was after I got the licence and that too a Maruti 800 belonging to the driving school which I drove on an open ground during which a tree surprised me by coming in my way!

Image Courtesy- dyn.quickmeme.com



100 comments:

  1. hehehe.. i have to agree.. most women don't know how to drive properly.
    I hate it when my mom drives coz she is so bad at reversing and parking. But thank god I got my dad's genes in driving. He is an aggressive driver and so am I. We are both equally crazy about cars and I've been known to curse and fight with both male and female drives who drive like circus clowns.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Then you could be an exception! and exceptional exception :D
      I am glad you are :D

      Delete
  2. Vey cute, but being a woman you should not be talking like this, huff and puff!
    It's such a universally accepted fact that women can't drive that I think it's more of a boon, imagine, you are driving and hit someone, hello, dint you see it was a female driver?

    I drive and am proudly a bad driver, but then I'm allowed to be, after all I'm a lady!
    Had written on similar lines some time back...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thankyou for reading this :D...I did check out your post :)

      Delete
  3. Someone is on a Stereotype busting spree by the looks of it.

    Being a lady driver - you can even run over the traffic cop and probably get away with saying a dozen sorry's and batting your eyelids while Men get royally screwed for a small line violation.

    Good one.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am just out of topics!Help me out!!!!!!!
      and yes...being a MAN on the road is difficult :P

      Delete
  4. hahaha I couldn't stop nodding my head.. coz I believe you're right..
    I have this problem of not being able to park.. i can drive for hrs but when it comes to parking, I just don't get it right.. Reverse is not for me :P

    Also as a habit, even in the most comfortable shoes, I remove them before driving.. it's a ritual I practice every time :D ... And lastly I agree the cops just let me off with an approving look... and importantly MEN are way better drivers than Women any day :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hehehe so you too are like my Mother :P...so effing cute!!!! and like I said, reversing is just not our thing!

      Delete
  5. I surprise myself by agreeing!! :D Specifically the parking bit.

    But grrr, we drive ok, ok? (just for effect :P)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes we drive OK, OK :D
      Thankyou for reading babe...you always do :)
      Respects!!

      Delete
  6. Hahaha the picture xD
    And damn, I was grinning from ear to ear while reading this! So bloody true! Every bit of it!
    I like your scene, following you up :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hehe I am happy that you came across my blog :)
      I did check out your blog too!

      Delete
  7. Hehehehe...Funny but true! Women can't drive well! Same here...I am busy panic-ing when I'm not driving alone. I'm always worried about the safety of the person sitting pillion on my scooty! :p

    Another thing....I can't just get away with some eyelid fluttering and a smile when caught by a traffic cop! :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hheheh this post is about car drivers..I am a great scooty or activa driver though :P

      Delete
  8. I follow a strict rule! Whenever possible, stay 50 meters away from any vehicle driven a female.

    And about the exception, my applied mathematics teacher is a good driver. In fact, she drives better than many of the male teachers and students. She actually drives I10 like a race car :s.

    Stay Blessed ^_^

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She drives an i10 like a race car, and you call it an exception :P

      Delete
    2. She drives it with confidence, that's what I meant
      and as long she doesn't crash or put others into trouble, she comes under exception :s

      As I mentioned earlier, she drives better than most of male teachers and students ~_~

      Delete
  9. Loll....yup maybe not all but most women I would say shouldn't ... quite true ....you can't be at both sides realli ... the women folk r gonna come down at you... you cant get away with an excuse kind u r out of topic ... these kinds of excuses don work with women in fact ... excuses don work with women ... even if they. R genuine good for us God made ice cream ..... ice cream always works with them ....so wat I m saying is can't be upon the good side of both the sexes ... you have gotta pick side red

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why do you think I am anonymous!! They cnt hurt me :P

      Delete
  10. I agree to your view, bad in reversing and parking :P but being feminist i say women too drive well. I got my four wheeler license three years back and i am not sure whether i can drive now :P

    I drive two wheeler, many times i escaped from traffic cops smile is wht helps me :)

    As usual a good innovative post :)

    Happy Sunday Red

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are the best when it comes to escaping from traffic problems!! Thanks for reading!

      Delete
  11. I also drove a swift at bangalore..and true to your words, I was good on the road, but parking and reverse parking was not my thing ! I also "touched" another car while parking in my office basement :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like I said, dont blame yourself. Science has the proof as to why women are so bad at pakring!!

      Delete
  12. For sure many women can't...
    and for that reason am not even gonna make an attempt :P

    ReplyDelete
  13. Replies
    1. Hi5 on that! Our views concur I see :). Welcome to the blog too!! and Thanks :D

      Delete
  14. I like the comedy strip in the beginning of the post.

    And, one thing is for sure, women don't know how to park. I don't know, that's why I don't drive big cars.

    Funny take on our misery...:P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Big cars sure look great but parking becomes such a troublesome thing to do!

      Delete
    2. Darling, we make good cars desirable. What is a fancy car without a super looking chic...:) Waste of money!!!

      Delete
  15. I just hate it. There is Women's Day but no Men's day. Sexist people with low conscious.

    I am expecting next post is on nitpicking men. Right? Right? Right?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hhehehehe nice topic btw!! I shall consider it,,,.. :P

      Delete
    2. P.S: Men who write such articles are deemed chauvinistic and faced with a barrage of verbal artillery.. Women like you .. simply get off.. It is an unfair world out there..

      SAVE THE MALE CHILD! AMEN..

      Delete
  16. When I was learning to drive..I could see everything on the road..from friends/acquaintances passing by to crows in the middle of the road feeding on sputum...that led me to stop the car..Imagine how my trainer reacted when I stopped the car thinking that I will run over the crow if I hadn't stopped.. ;)

    I leave my steering wheel when there's a bigger vehicle around me..and SURPRISE! I have a license too! :P

    Not driven a car on my own till now.. why not sit on the seat besides the driver and watch the world go passing by? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SEE! SEE!!! So i do have company! God is great isnt it? We suck at something still we get away with it :P
      and bastard crows!! :x

      Delete
  17. Hehe women are bad drivers because they do not have spatial sense as strong as men ( anatomy teaches that :P ) So yes parking and passing through narrow lanes without hitting something is difficult for women.
    Seriously did you get a license just like that???

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. heheh I did Maith!! Just like tht!!! Maybe my dad bribed him though :P
      shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

      Delete
  18. HEY! :|
    I am THE best. Very proud about that too. Proud to the point of arrogance. ^.^

    But, it is a sad truth of life. Most women cannot keep the steering straight neither reverse. Beats me. But like a hypocrite I never accept the general stigma attached to women drivers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ok you are ze beshhhtttt!!
      Its just a stigma only..We are awesome :P

      Delete
  19. As unfortunate as this is, I have to agree.... I myself have never driven but seeing it on the road I can say that women on the count of either being extra careful or the things you mentioned, men may be rash drivers but all in all they are better drivers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. But you never know until you try! You could be the exception :D

      Delete
  20. OH yea, women and their driving. But they know how to get away with it, don't they? :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. Haha. true story!
    When it comes to driving and cooking, we shoul leave it to men! :P

    Love ur blog. And the twitter bg! :D
    love
    Twisha! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. cooking also??!!! Hmmm....
      Thankyou for dropping by :D

      Delete
  22. Alrighty! That makes it two of us:P Seriously, why do trees always come in the middle of the road when we try an 'eight' as instructed by RTO??? I too have my four wheeler license, but have been banned unconditionally from even touching our car, after two accidents that left a big hole in my husband's pocket and a poor suzuki's petrol tank:P So it is always two wheeler...WHY SHOULD BOYS HAVE ALL THE FUN?:P

    ReplyDelete
  23. Oh...after thought, adding this video, have fun watching it:P
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rHY1qKLLws

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TWO WHEELERS KI JAI!!!! YES YES YES YES! I DRIVE AWESOMELY AWESOME!!!!!
      That video was lol-arious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Delete
  24. I was just thinking of doing a post on how women can drive as well as men :P

    And when it comes to the eyelid fluttering, all the cops who've caught me (or a lot of girls I know), they just like to scare them and get the money out of them. They've even made up rules thinking "She's a girl, she'll buy it."

    I just realised I can drive with heels. Woohoo!
    And I don't look at my face in the mirror (Thank god im not that pretty) or text :D :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are the exceptional case my love! I am porud of you1 Here is a standing ovation!!:D

      Delete
  25. I am the worst driver humanity could ever produce :P ROfling post :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ahahahahaahah!! You have competition!!!!

      Delete
  26. Meeeeeeeano. Women can drive. :P I've tried, though I'm not 18 yet. I cant wait to be 18!!! But kinda funny :P LOL. The rear view mirror thing and heels thing. ROFL!!! :p

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hehehe I shall pray that you turn out to be an exception! :p

      Delete
  27. hehe....Your P.P.S is exactly my situation. But tree did not come in my way. I was just driving in a zig-zag fashion. I just couldn't drive straight! And my licence is more or less an ID proof. Women can't drive but we do love long drives:) Isn't it?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. exactly!! It is an ID proof for me too :P
      But I look like a smuggler in it, so I prefer using my PAN card :P

      Delete
  28. I could totally go on a long drive alone on a four wheeler. Problem? I can not drive. I can ride a bike, but I am too petite for a cruiser bike, so I walk. Sigh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are awesome when it comes to two wheelers :D

      Delete
  29. Lol that's true..most women don't drive well! the rear view mirror and parking points are spot on!
    plus driving in heels is really a task :D

    ReplyDelete
  30. Fully agree. Not hating on my own kind, but we're one screwed up bunch. Women and asian, and asian women. Can't drive period.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hahahahah hahahhahahaha Thankyou sooo much dropping by!!

      Delete
  31. Completely second your opinion. Women cant drive, properly. Period.

    They also monopolize roads, driving right through the middle, never letting others over take and parking gracefully wherever they want!!!

    Me too armed with a license and has driven car just twice, leaving it with bruises :D its tough to admit, but its true. We cant have a good relationship with machines.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They should make separate road for woman where woman can drive only one at a time and 50 mts away fromt he next woman :P

      Delete
  32. How true!! Every guy must be nodding his head in agreement! I defend myself in front of my guy when he criticizes my driving skills.But deep down i know, he is correct!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hehehehe...neevr own up before him!!!!

      Delete
  33. ok... first I thought I would quietly go be a back bencher in this post; but then, me being me, I HAD to comment - for once, I disagree! I drive pretty well, can go from docile to downright aggressive depending on the road behaviors (docile in Kannur, agressive in Delhi), can reverse a whole street, can parallel park, and absolutely loooooooove to drive...... But I think it has to do with the fact that I learnt to drive pretty early in life - like most male drivers do. Wome, unfortunately, pick up driving later in life, making them amatuers ..... just a thought

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are our local DANICA PARKER!! send me an autograph!! :D
      XOXOXOXO!

      Delete
  34. psstt..come close..lemme tell you a secret.

    I CANT HANDLE EVEN A BICYCLE. so a car is outta question onlyyy..
    sighhh..even i agree..women are just not born to drive..
    so i never argue wen ppl say guys drive better..offcourse they do..

    but we can "RIDE" better...
    bwahahahahahhahahahahhaaaaaaaaaaaaa
    soryyyy..couldn't help it...khi khi khi

    Nnice post my red louuuuu
    and wat outta topics ma..this be good onliii..!! :* <3

    cheers!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yes baby!1 we do ride well..actually very well :P

      Delete
  35. Holy ritual?? Muahahahaha :D

    Totally agree with the post. But yeah no one can outsmart a woman when it comes to getting away from the cops. I've helped so many drunk guy friends get away. Sigh, talk about taking advantage of the so called weaker sex.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Guys complain about our bad driving but then they ened us to get out of the rash driving they do!!

      Delete
  36. Precisely why I chose to not drive. One more reason you can add to the list- Petrified of traffic, especially big buses and trucks. I'm pretty sure if I were to drive, especially in a crowded city like Hyderabad, then I would park to the side, wait for all the traffic to go, and then drive. :/
    And high-faive sistah! I got a license loooong back, but the only purpose it serves now is as an ID card, that's all. :/ I hardly drove after getting my license. When I asked dad once if I can take the car out, he told me I can take it out on a harthal-day. :( I'm way too scared of traffic, and just cannot get that gear-clutch co-ordination.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ID it is for me too! But I look like a smuggler in it, so I prefer using my PAN card :P
      and atleast ur Dad lets you take it out on a harthal day :P
      My dad prefers to let my 14 yr old brother do it but not me :(

      Delete
  37. hahahhahaha... tht was hilarious! but I dont agree to it! :P
    sorry RED! Dont wanna enrage u but I dont agree! :P
    I proudly claim to drive better than my brother! xD
    n all the things u mentioned here are wat he faces while driving, not me! :P
    but as usual a gr8 post! :D :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hHHEHEHEH here is another exceptional case!! I AM GLAD THT I CAME ACROSS YOU :D

      Delete
  38. Hi, pls give me your email id will give you the subject for your next post. Its a topic that has nearly burst my nerves. This post is extremely well written. One of the reasons i want you to write on this particular topic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey! Sweet of u to drop by! Why dnt u gimme the topic as a reply here? Wud consider it and if its fits the type of posts I do, I definitely would take it up :)

      Delete
    2. No issues........its just that i dont have the writing skills to even present it here politely......but if u insist....this was the display in my town of a leading textile showroom on valentines day " male and female red and white inner unmentionables displayed in a heart shape" . This showroom is not and innergarments store....hope you get the point.

      Delete
  39. oh yes without being shouted upon this i can say for sure women cant drive, in my 7-8 years of service 67% of tickets are given to women because of some silly things they do :)

    Although Exceptions are there , my sister drives much better then me for sure ...

    made me laugh thank you

    Bikram's

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See now I have statistics to back me up! Thankyou :D

      Delete
  40. Hahaha.. I'm pretty sure tht women r better drivers thn me.. :)

    I once aimed fr the same tree tht came ur way but drove myself n the jeep into the adjoining lake.. a few kind lorries had to come over to pull the jeep outta the lake.. n, tht was only practice :)

    Lovely read, Red :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Okie!! I must say that the next time my father allows me to touch the car, I wont be as bad as you turned out to be! LAKE!!! seriously?? :P
      Now thinking about it, I live close to Bhopal lake :/ and in Kerala, very close to marine drive :/

      Delete
  41. When i read the topic, I immediately thought about "Danica Patrick" and am glad that you mentioned her name in the post - there are exceptions :)

    Btw, nice pic :D The rock surely is shocked to hear the reply :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. How could I not mention Danica Patrick! Isnt she beautiful too!!!!!!!!
      Hhehe thanks for reading!

      Delete
  42. I had my share of bad driving too.. But now I am proud of my driving skills..

    i agree to most of the points, and I think, females, who only drive to show off their fancy cars fall in this category..
    But I am sure, I'd like to consider that I do not belong to the above mentioned category! :D :D

    Great post, as usual :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Another exception here people!!!! :D
      Thanks for reading girl!!!!!

      Delete
  43. I realised after reading this post that am a closet feminist.... :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ya... My blood is boiling as I read the post and the comments. How can women so blandly accept they can't drive?

      Coming from a family where my mom and her twin sister drive a four wheeler and a two wheeler in so much freaking precision (touch wood) I do not accept that the women are dexterously challenged... I have seen men struggling with four wheelers at the driving school I went to learn... its all PRACTICE...

      Rather... these women who cannot drive well are too protected by the men in their lives....

      Come on ladies... you are better than this...

      I am not outraging but my hidden feminist side is revealing surprising even me...

      The same thing goes to Men cannot cook... or the new age women cannot cook because she is a professional... I have been fed by more men than women in the recent months...

      Delete
  44. I used to wonder why women prefer to drive bare foot. You classified that for me.
    wrt to reverse parking: I had prof at college who was perfect at it. She would speed into the parking- break- engage the reverse gear and ssszzzzzzwwwwwwwwin (parked in one go, that too perfect to scales). Where I used to struggle moving the car front and back at least 3 times to do the same task.
    I love it when ladies drive. That's a turn on. So I don't care how they do it.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Ohhhh..I so wanted to comment here ;)

    Okay now for the record,im one of those lady drivers who does the holy ritual by removing shoes before driving..its so much convenient to drive that way ;) and I'm someone who can speed on highway but can never do reverse parking :(

    and i hate dolls over cars..seriously hate that :D

    P.S: FYI...I drive after 5 years taking driving license..:O ..I hope you will drive one day..its fun especially driving (speeding at night) ;)

    all da best

    ReplyDelete
  46. Good you have a licence. I can't even drive a bike! Four wheeler is way beyond my reach. ;)

    And I agree, women can't drive. ;)

    Good post Red. :)

    ReplyDelete
  47. Loved Reading this post :-)
    There are a few exceptions, BUt yes, MOst of the Women I know just can't seem to handle the 4 wheeler :-)

    ReplyDelete
  48. I think women can drive.Just that men are not supportive enough.Take the case when I need to check my lip gloss and the guy honks and honks at the traffic signal..Uff can't he be a little patient?

    Jokes apart,my dad never trusted my driving skills.So I remain a license driver with zero experience in driving..

    ReplyDelete
  49. LOL! I was laughing all through this post! It is true women get distracted in the process of "multi tasking" :D .However I'm glad my dad dropped his genes to me and I drive pretty well.Yes I do drive like a rough driver but I'm safe! :)

    Your newest follower :)

    ReplyDelete
  50. Another excellent post! One that makes me sorry I haven't visited your blog oftener lately. You write in an amusing style about amusing little things. Good job!

    And glad to be the 100th commenter. :)

    ReplyDelete

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