Sunday, 12 May 2013

DATE A MAN WHO LOVES OLD MONK




Date a man who loves Old Monk. Date a man whose loyalty lies to the elixir that patiently blended itself for 7 years. You will find him quietly sitting by the bar of the pub you ritually visit, enjoying the company of a bottle of Buddha Sadhu, untouched by the madness around.  He is the guy sitting beside you in the flight; trying his best to cover up his discomfort on the lack of Old Monk but the availability of useless Beer and Red Wine on board. Strike a conversation with him and ease his pain. Ask him about his favourite Rum and see the twinkle in his eyes. 
  
Date a man who loves Old Monk because he is dependable. While the women around you fuss about their men and their bad hangovers, you would be the one waking up to a man ready with a cuppa coffee for you. The Old Monk knows that a hangover shouldn’t be an effect of last night’s divine alcoholic escapade.
   
It is amazing to date a man who loves Old Monk. Like his favourite rum he is an experience that you would like to have every chance you get without even a hint of change made to it. He is manly and he attracts recognition and while his comrades go on advertising their worth to gain your attention, he sits back because knows that you will come to him. He is smooth in his approach and he is just like his favourite Old Monk.

It is easy to date a man who loves Old Monk. Buy him an Old Monk XXX Rum for his birthday and hear him pledge his allegiance towards you for life. Get him Old Monk Gold Reserve Rum on Valentine’s Day and watch him kneel down to propose you. 
   
You must date a man who loves Old Monk. He is magnetic just like his preferred rum and no matter which bloke tries to sweep you away from him; you will be stuck to him like glue. He knows you are his to keep. He is the same yet full of surprises and sex with him would be a rush you cannot have enough of. Just like his rum he doesn’t allow you to forget him for his touch lingers upon you and fades into a beautiful memory which cannot be ever erased. 
   
Actually marry the guy who loves Old Monk. He is a people’s guy and doesn’t choose friends after checking their pockets. He is there to console his friend from College who failed in his 5th attempt at the civil services exams and he is there even to congratulate his affluent colleague on his latest promotion. Just like his beloved rum, he is not judgemental and is a good listener. 
   
Grow old with a guy who loves Old Monk. He will be the same man you fell in love with and time would never change him for the worst. Being similar to his pet rum, he too would never change with time. But do not see this as a negative trait, for you know you love him just the way he is.
   
Date a man who loves Old Monk, because you deserve it. You deserve a man who can give you the fruitiest life imaginable. If you can only give him the monotony of Carlsberg, Red Label or a Signature, then you are better off alone. But if you want a truly memorable life with a man worthy of it all, date a man who loves Old Monk.
 
It’s high time you found a man who loves Old Monk and made him yours, because like they say, a man is what a man drinks. 

Or better yet, date a man who loves Chivas. 



P.S-How are you guys? I just got back after an amazing Europe trip and my spine got its must deserved rest after all the bumpy rides it took on our adventurous Indian roads. I loved everything about Europe, except the whole 'WIPING BUSINESS'. If you know what I mean :P
P.P.S- No, I was not dead! and yes, I missed you all too :D
                                                                                                       

68 comments:

  1. i dated someone like that...*sigh* it still lingers! ur right! :P

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  2. yeah got those witty pinches.. most of them...lol

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  3. Ma'am, you have done a great service for this small old monk drinking community. I salute you. Its better even than the so worshiped black label in a way.
    But chivas is shit.

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    1. Hahah atleast we agree about the epicness of the OMR!

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  4. I married a man who loves old monk :D

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    Replies
    1. NOW YOU KNOW WHAT i AM TALKING ABOUT!!!!!

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  5. Yes I agree, the toilet paper is a lot harder over there,unless in India you use the squirt bottle method ,or the water spout and a hole in the ground.Here in USA we have very soft toilet paper however,and some are two ply.I'm glad they don't put perfume and color in it any longer because a female private part should never come in touch with perfumes. The color was put in to match the toilet's color,and I'm glad the toilet covers are gone too,it's filthy,the toilet has to be kept at absolute pristine condition. God says I'm such a great housekeeper and I of course am in agreement with Him as always. I'll post a Video of it to show you how to really get the job done if you like in case you want proof that I know how to keep a bathroom clean. What's the filthiest bathroom you've ever seen?

    I prefer Bacardi and getting high in the Holy Ghost. But I understand about your addiction to alcohol,been there done that. I was delivered in an instant of Alcoholism by one Word from God,and therefore believe I have a gift to deliver others even you through Jesus of Alcoholism,He-in-me hope of glory.His name is mighty. I'm just an Old Hag and a filthy rag without Jesus.

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    1. HAHAHAH....Well its not about dirty toilets or even rough toiler paper. A hand spray pipe should be there atleast you know :P
      and Jesus of alchoholism, now that's new to me! But AMEN!!!!! Hahaha

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    2. I don't understand mens' lingo about masturbation, and why sex is so all important to them because I'm all woman,and sex is not that important to them, but stability and security is. What about men,is that not important to them? I recognize greatness in you,you are an important man.

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  6. did u hear about the mannequin they were planning for the city center in ur honor... :D

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    Replies
    1. I did hear a rumour. Now I know!! Lol for reading boss!

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  7. I'm having happy tears. :-) This is the best thing an Old Monk'er can read. I'm sharing this post to everyone who asks me why I love it. The holiest of all drinks. All hail 'Old Monk'. :-)

    The amount of truth and revelations in this post may suggest you might have dated or are dating a man who loves Old Monk. ;-)

    Now lets see how many women take your advice. :P :D

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    1. Hahahha the revelations are not true, but one does not require to date one to want to date one like that :P
      and knowing that you are an Old Monker....I pray women do take up my advice!!!
      Thanks for reading Boss!!!!

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  8. The makers of Old Monk will salute you and even find you one such guy for this brilliant piece!

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  9. I love old monk! YAY! And I love the post. I hope I fall in love with one such man! :D

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    1. I will pray to Old Monk for your benefit!! :P

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  10. Masterpiece!!! RED this is brilliant :D you should forward this on facebook just like that Date a girl who reads wala post :D :D
    :* :* Good going girl!!

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    1. Anonymous hoon, warna kar deti :P

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  11. LOL! I actually dated a man who loved Old Monk ;)

    I know the wiping business :D

    Welcome back. :)

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    1. Now you too know what I am talking about then!!!!

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  12. I love OMR.. :D BTW makes me want to chug down a bottle with my beer buddies..:D

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    1. What's stopping you! Make plans this weekend!

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  13. and this post is going to make sure that the old monk man will love you forever :)

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    Replies
    1. Aww...you are being a gem now!!!

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  14. Oh its nice you had a good break .. missed you. I love to marry a guy who loves old monk, because even i love it :P

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    1. Now only you....Missed me :(. M sooo glad :D
      AND Now may the force be with you and help you in your search for the Old Monker!

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  15. I don't know about loving a man who loves Old monk, it'll be too much competition because I LOVE OLD MONK! I think I'll date a man who loves Old monk but can't handle too much of it. That way I'll have the best of both worlds.

    LOVED every word of it! Sharing this with my Old Monk Buddies!

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    1. Welcome to me blog Miss!!!! Cool, atleast you are considering dating. and yes competition isnt a good thing :D

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    2. Haha I was so excited reading your article I forgot all about my tenses. Correction- I ended up dating (and marrying) a man who loves old monk but after a few drinks, goes back to his first love, beer. Nevertheless, our journey has been documented very accurately by you. Cheers!

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  16. A very nice portray of a man. I prefer Chivas over Old Monk though :) Loved it :)

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  17. and not to forget.......welcome back :D

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  18. I should start drinking this...

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    1. Damn...m turning ppl into alcoholics!!

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  19. Can you write a post telling men "Date a woman who loves old monk" ;)
    Ofcourse they won't date.. Society !! :D
    But this is a great post.. unlike u..but good one nonetheless!

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    Replies
    1. Hahahah.....m sure they will..Ok some men will..and we will find those men :P

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  20. I've never had Old Monk, then again, I haven't had the chance to try too many rums.

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  21. Glad I came across this. Such a refreshing take on men and monks!

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    blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please blast me an e-mail if interested.
    Thanks!

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  23. Ahem... I hope you don't drop unconscious after reading what I'm going to type next.

    Actually, I had to Google-up 'Old monk' when I saw the picture at the top. Before which, I was wondering why would a man be in love with a monk...

    Umm... I hope you are back to life now. Well, now you know I'm as familiar to liquor and their brands as fish are to tree-tops. :D And going by your post, this quality doesn't sound as a good dating prospect for someone like me. :-(

    By the way, do we get to see any of the nice pictures of European landscapes which you were lucky to set your eyes on ? :-)

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    1. Hehehehehe....so you are an innocent little boy. I find it adorable in this world filled with alcoholics and substance abusers.
      Yes clicked some amazing pics!

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  24. i thought old monk spell binds onli the drinker ....!! i used to think onli i could understand my love affairs with that irreplaceable liqour and that women would never relish the otherwise sweet smell of the raw yet polished rum that old monk was (women onli want bacardi ,,!!),,we have had such initimate moments under its influence ,.,,!! i believe somehow captain jack sparowws secret is he has found old monk and stored a lot of it...!! and uses it day in a nd day out and thats his real treasure...thats wat keeps him going ..!! i mean it single handedly manage to get me through my engineering .(may be not singel handedly,,,!! i cannot take credit away friends ,,!! no i m not talking about my actual friends but the tv series friends ,,!!).. it can do n e thing it is almost god like ,,!! you have keen observation lady i must say ,,,!!

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  25. Old & Monk

    for me these words dont belongs to each other though when forced joined form a different sort of nirvana.

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    1. Couldn't have been more perfectly explained!

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  26. Old Monk seems to have left you something worth thinking about.

    Well, you sure can go by that theory, yet know the point where they leave the bottle when its empty.

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    1. Its the inside that matters :P
      Thankyou for reading!

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  27. My theory.

    Pretentious MCP dominating men full of false male ego, sprinkled with insecurity show off their affection for Single Malt. If he is a seasoned man and knows the complete process, knows how his single malt was made and is flattering yet respectful....he actually loves whisky. Also, they are players.

    Rum drinkers or bourbon drinkers on the other hand are usually genuine and honest not so handsome men. Very respectful and faithful too but they wouldn't be charmers.

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  28. Red ...brilliant stuff man...and as i read the post i was going"hmm yes pretty much " being married to a breed of men who like their drinks like it out to be, is an assurance that you got the good deal :)

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    1. Now I am happy, that you proved me right!!

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  29. DAYUM.
    Now I need to find someone who doesn't need the rum to be this awesome.
    Difficult times to live in man.
    :P

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  30. This almost convinced me to find someone who loves his old monk :D Good one!!

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  31. hahhahaa...i went there last month. and i too hateeeee wiping business!!

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  32. I loved this. I think I shared this with everyone I know.
    I thought I was delusional at first about the man of my dreams, but now I think I know. :)

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  33. Now all of us can sing along, listen to the new old monk Anthem
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlmG5ILsD7U

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  34. Now that's one way to look at it! ;)
    And of course wrt my post, a guy who drinks socially is not a boozer! (And I got wiki definition to support me) :D

    Cheers!

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Spit It Out I Say !!!